There are different kinds of love. However, only one caught my interest; the love we share with someone else. I call it the "secret love" because only two people can understand what they both feel about it. It is the same when you are alone with your God and you pray. The love that exists between you and God is secret; it cannot be explained or described. Well, let's talk business now :D
So many people get scared about losing or getting into a distance relationship. In fact, I was really scared before until my boyfriend tells me: "The biggest distance in a couple is not the physical distance but the lack of communication." When he said this, I couldn't understand at the beginning. I've watched and analysed my parent's relationship and I realized that two people can leave in the same room but still feel the distance. meaning, the distance is not always physical but it can also be a state of mind if you do not corporate or communicate with your mate. Well, you may be confused, but you'll understand better as you read.I have been living a distance relationship for about 3 years now. The advice I'll share with you is what my boyfriend and I have been doing and it worked with us. I believe if you do the same, that will also work for you.
Here are four tips I'll share with you:
- Trust
When you decide to be in a relation, it is important to trust your mate. If you do not trust him or her, then there's no point of being together because this will affect your relationship at long term especially for a distance relation. Trust is the first key. Now, you may ask yourself what if my boyfriend or my girlfriend cheats. Well, that's the thing. There are people even during their marriage they do cheat, but that does not mean the person is not in love with you?! Right?? I do not agree with someone cheating but we should all understand that nobody is perfect and things can happen; but we gotta learn how to overcome those difficulties. What I mean by trust is, being sure that NOBODY will come between you and your mate. Mistakes can happen but both of you should comprehend that those mistakes must not tear you apart. I, for example, trust my boyfriend. Sometimes I feel like he cheats on me but I know he belongs to me. Distance relationships are not always easy.
Indeed, It takes years to develop and can be destroyed in a seconds. That is the reason why, you must trust your mate and never listen to what people are telling you. Listen to your heart and your heart is your mate :)
2. Communication
This is the MOST important thing in any relationship. We will never cease to communicate. Whether in a distance relationship or not, you MUST communicate. Communication is not only about telling each other how much "I love you" but it's about sharing ideas, discussing about certain issues. For example, if there's a breaking news, try to talk about that. Discuss about your future, how good or bad your day was, what you're planning to do the next day, your good and bad moments, your happiness and sadness. Also, if you didn't appreciate what your mate did to you, better tell him or her and solve all the issues. Tell your mate about your feelings. Now, there are a lot of way to communicate. You can talk and or text by phone using Skype, Viber, Cacao Talk, Facebook Call, Phones call, and so on. You can also video Skype where you guys can see each other. My boyfriend and I usually use email since we both busy but any way is find; as long as you communicate and express your feelings and emotions, every things will be fine.
3. Loyalty
It is important to support one another. The physical distance should not prevent you from being loyal to your mate. Sending message or calling your mate and tell him or her how much you're proud and support him or her makes the relationship better. Your mate will feel love and especially supported. This attitude will make your relation stronger.
4. Love
Last but not least, of course LOVE your mate. What else should I write that you do not know?! Just love him/her as you always do.
If you need to talk or send me an email, visit the Contact Page or email me at beautybymyriam@yahoo.com . I'll be gladly to help you with my own experience with distance relationship.
